has anyone told their significant other to fuck off because they interfere with...

[ajdos]

i lost 10 ajdos!!!,sadly i want them back, my prime growing years.

Man I feel for you, for me all the cheating and bullshit she did really paled in comparison to the years of my life she took, twice I tried to leave and twice she begged me to come back.
After I read the emails I knew one thing she never gave 2 shits about me from the get go, she was just a co-dependent psycho who didnt want to be alone, she just wanted me around to keep her company while she was in love with this other dood.
Ironically she asked me for a divorce because he had gotten divorced, and she was going to finally run off into the sunset with him...or so she thought, he was a player he was screwin a bunch of women who were younger than her and had no kids.
He kicked her to the curb hard, I didnt know about him at that point so she asked me to 'work things out'.
When I found the emails a month later, I gave her the business, like I said I told her to fuck off, and one of the things she said (besides denying what I read happened) was she was sorry for wasting all my years.
Of all the things that was the one that struck a nerve, I dont care how many men she slept with and all that, but robbing my life of 7 years that I could have been spending with someone else pissed me off, time is something you get a finite amount of and you can never get back.
Ironically as I said shes a lonely fat whore now.
I have a good relationship with a hot blonde who is terrific, bout the best thing that came out of my divorce was meeting my girlfriend 2 months later.

 

[Glycomann]

If we were in person i would say "i have no idea what you just said but you sure looked cute saying it" lololol...

She's saying it's all on us.. the men. They just have to look good and be emotional.

 

[dangerouscurves]

She's saying it's all on us.. the men. They just have to look good and be emotional.

Nope, thats just one small portion of it all!
the woman, has a huge roll and factor obviously,
Oldschool, sounds like you have a good head on your shoulders, and can honestly say if you are doing it and taking the time, then my only advice, is to sit her down, and explain, that the gym is a place for you to find release, and be masculine, without the gym, you would feel pent up, and unable to relax with her, and indulge her with her feminine needs, and as far as overtime and not spending as much time together, I would explain that you work overtime , to keep your job, and support your household, as a token of your love, and support, and that by working overtime it is not an effort to spend more time out of the house, but an effort to be successful in this very difficult market, and that it will be a temporary sacrifice for long term success. assure her that you love and adore her, and let her know that the time spent together will be hers. sometimes women just need to hear what it is that they want, to know that you understand, and a re communicating, as the feminine wants.

 

[dangerouscurves]

it sounds like you have a great wife. im sure she is just concerned with your health. we women are like that with someone we love, we want then to be around for a long time to take care of us. we are made to be that way, too look after and care about those we love. make her a compromise, tell her you will go and get blood work and a physical twice yearly if you can workout as intensely as you like. if things come back compromised then you can dial it down. and then make a doctors appointment

agree with this as well.

and for your post on the other page, like I said before it sounds like she want to HEAR that your dedication to her is as real as your dedication to her, and turning the OCD into a joke may be a good way to lighten the topic

 

[NutNut]

hey nutnut, no bro, my relationship, gym, work are all tied in, we go out, when we can afford it, watch movies, go to the beach, just gets bumpy, but she voices her concerns as to my intense dedication.

Well brother the fact shes still voicing the concerns is a good sign because I know from experience, when they stop being open it's game over. Sounds like it might be time to just sit down and chat with her, try and get it all straight and remind her how important she is to you.

 

[oldschool1967]

thanks nutnut and dc!! tis cool, just one more thing on my plate i need not argue about.

 

[PillarofBalance]

it sounds like you have a great wife. im sure she is just concerned with your health. we women are like that with someone we love, we want then to be around for a long time to take care of us. we are made to be that way, too look after and care about those we love. make her a compromise, tell her you will go and get blood work and a physical twice yearly if you can workout as intensely as you like. if things come back compromised then you can dial it down. and then make a doctors appointment

This...............

I'm pretty sure you're wife would like this. But also, a good part of it is she just wants some time. Set a date night, or don't set one and go out anyway. Doesn't have to cost money. A walk/lunch at a local arboretum is free and women love that kinda crap...

 

[IronInsanity]

With my ex, I never really discussed my lifting. I worked out at noon at my corp gym and was only home for one of my meals so it didn't interfere much. She knew I was dedicated to it and made an occasional comment on how my body was changing. But it would have been nice to have someone to share my love for and interest in bodybuilding. But I never brought it up because I knew she didn't. If it didn't involve watching TV and eating potato chips it didn't interest her. In my relationship right now we share this same interest among other common interests, although we don't workout together. I've found that a little encouragement or compliment from her means more to me than 1000 from others and makes me want to work that much harder.

 

[Benchingover500]

aj,

man it seems like you really loved your ex & she really hurt you. make sure you let go of all the frustration from that relationship so you can really enjoy that good woman. you'll know her because you can smell her as you think about her during the day, & she compliments you & who you fundamentally are. me & my wife took forever to get married, but after a decade of doing the long distance thing & finally being in the same city, the marriage was crystallized before the wedding. good luck man.

 

[kane.d3]

Yes, I tell all women training and work are 1 and 2, she has to be ok with the 3 spot......they always are, at least they say. Then they get some dick and want to be number one. Then they gotta go!

 

[400Lb Gorilla]

A balance needs found. You need to give your woman attention or someone else will. A relationship is pointless if you don't make time for eachother. The reality is training does not take much time, maintaining a GOOD relationship does. I would sacrifice my OT before I gave up a good woman. It doesn't sound like she is saying stop training it sounds like she is saying "where's our time together".

As for asking what your taking, if she were to take things and not tell you what they were would you not ask? I'd give my left nut for someone that cared enough to want to actually know. If they tried to tell me to stop i'd tell them they were insane but at the end of the day, if I put myself in a relationship with a loyal woman she comes 2nd only to my son. As much as I love lifting and won't totally give it up I'd find time for her because it's needed. If it means waking up an hour earlier to lift before work or dropping a day of OT to take her out and nurture that ember into a flame, do it. No woman will accept having no time with their partner nor should they be expected to.

this is some excellent advice. my wife understands the reasons behind my working out. i am a happier more level person when i am getting in the gym. but there are times she has asked me to skip a workout for one reason or another or to atleast make sure it happens during lunch or before work. i tend to do so. but it takes the balance mentioned above. my wife realizes that 4-6 hours a week isnt shit when the pay off is a better looking, stronger, and better feeling me

 

[BlueDevil]

Gotta find a balance and help her understand how important to you your training is. My wife is pregnant and we have a two year old but she knows that if I don't lift then it effects everything else in my life. I didn't get home till 9:30pm tonight and she went to bed an hour later. I saw her for all of 2 hours today and I told her that I'll be home even later tomorrow night. I make up for this by spending my days off with my family even if it is doing chores or running errands we do it together so we have some time.

To me this is just life and that's just the way it is. If you don't want to live on welfare then I have to work. If you don't want to be a fat ass then I have to workout and that's really the only thing that I do for myself. These things take time and it is not my fault there is only 24hrs in a day. So some days we barely see each other but that's life for us and for most people.

Some people want to have their cake and eat it to, they are never satisfied, but if your girl sincerely cares then she'll learn to accept your passion to lift and you'll learn to compensate when you can... or she could just be a cunt like AJ's ex in which case you should run now and run fast. lol...