Powerlifting on hold, health paramount.

[SAD]

I'm terrible at keeping up with logs, but I'll give it another go.

In the last 7 months, I dislocated my left knee 3 days before a PLing meet (slightly tearing my patella tendon), dislocated my right knee (tearing my femoral patella medial ligament completely off and slightly tearing my patella tendon), tore my left pec in the muscle tissue (enough to bruise, not to require surgery), tore my labrum in my left shoulder, and then a month after tearing my labrum I tore my left subscapularis AND my left pectoral tendon. I'm a month into physical therapy, but they are having a helluva time treating a torn labrum/subscap/pec, individually, without exacerbating the other two injuries in the same shoulder. It very well may end in surgery even though all 3 tears are grade 2.

I'm currently out of the gym for the most part because I can't bench or deadlift or squat, and I don't care about calves/forearms/abs. Not being able to get good work done in the gym, and seeing my size/shape change, and feeling my strength wane, is pretty demotivating and depressing, but combined with a handful of setbacks and huge life-changes, it is the catalyst for a renewed focus on my goals and health.


7 months ago I was 315lbs and felt super strong (and fat and happy). I was on a pretty heavy cycle and ate 6000+ cals everyday, without fail.

As of today, I am 281lbs and feel weak (and still fat and lazy and unhappy). I have been completely off of any AAS or GH or ANYTHING for about 2 months, although the test undec that was in my blend kept my test levels normal for probably 5 weeks after my last pin. I'm just now starting to really feel the emotional and physical effects of low T. Appetite sucks, sex-drive sucks, attitude sucks, etc.

Here's what I am going to do. First I'm going to jump on a low-dose TRT regimen, test 180mg/wk and GH 1.5iu/night of serostims. Next, I'm going to do a serious cleanse with a natural-but-powerful supplement, alongside of a more naturapathic detox called "oil pulling" (look it up). Alongside the cleanse, I'm going to fix my diet and get on something sustainable and healthy. Modified Paleo IF with Bulletproof coffee every morning should do the trick. By modified I mean, with additional white potatoes and occasional white rice. For those that don't know what Bulletproof coffee is, it's just any single-source organic coffee, with a tablespoon of unsalted grassfed butter and a tablespoon of pure MCT oil added. You blend it and it turns into this creamy frothy mix of energy and focus and health benefits, without hurting the IF process much at all. Next comes cardio, which I absolutely despise but will do for my heart's health and fat-loss. Finally, I need to quit using tobacco. I have no issue with abstaining from alcohol, but tobacco needs to go.

Gym involvement will be limited and will be based loosely on my physical therapists' recommendations. Nothing at all for at least another month though.

Goals: drop bodyfat (no target weight or bodyfat % in mind, just a look), improve overall health through diet/cardio, recover from injuries.

 

[Regulator]

Sounds like those abs will be showing a whole lot more soon. Hope you get better man and sorry to hear about your set backs. Im sure your still a beast!

 

[Jenner]

Sounds like a solid and much needed change Happy to hear you are doing this and wish you nothing but the best!!!

 

[uphillclimb]

Here for your support brother. While I can't empathize with everything, this year has been my most difficult for injuries....feel like a walking ailment sometimes as if "what's next?". This is a very good move for you overall and I'm happy that you've humbled yourself to view this from a high level.

 

[SAD]

Thanks y'all. This process has been humbling, which was probably much needed.

 

[PillarofBalance]

Welcome to my world. I did manage to get myself a script for TRT while down. Maybe you should consider that.

 

[woodswise]

Welcome back Brother.

Edit: I'm glad to hear you're getting things back on track again.

 

[shortz]

Seriously man, that weight is going to beat up anyone over time. Between joints, spine, and heart health, you will no doubt feel better and possibly live longer. I know you're taller than me, but man, even at 240lbs I could feel the weight wearing me down and decided I needed to just lean down a bit

 

[macgyver]

SAD

Really sucks to hear. It sounds like you know what is best moving forward. I too have found that I was getting beat up too bad by constantly trying to push heavy. My injuries were mounting and I backed off for a good 3 months. Good news, is I really did not lose anything when I came back. Funny how we think our gains will evaporate when in reality, if they do, they were only temporary anyway.

Best of luck and best health moving forward. Find the balance you want in your life and accept that being the strongest is not always the most enjoyable.

Mac

 

[flex001]

Damn, sorry to hear. You sound like a strong mofo inside and out. Hope all gets on track soon.

Also, thanks for the Bullet Proof Coffee info. I'm currently on a Keto diet and will be rushing to get all ingredients tomorrow.

 

[IronInsanity]

Good luck SAD. Take care of yourself.

 

[SAD]

Thanks all.

Physical therapy is frustrating. I don't feel like I'm doing much, but then I'm sore and in more pain afterwards. Trying to stay optimistic that I'll be able to heal up without surgery, but I can't even bench the bar without pain.

Will be smashing leg presses (it's the best I can do) two or three times a week, along with anything else that I can do without my left shoulder (including abs). Weight is up to 285 even though I've been fasting with the bulletproof coffee and eating pretty damn clean in my 8 hour window. I attribute it to the test and growth. Even TRT levels I feel significantly better within the last 4 days.

I feel pretty great to be honest, which is surprising because my life is unusually stressed right now. I've had more energy and greater focus. One thing I always notice when I cleanse is an unnerving anxiety for the first few days. I attribute it positively to the toxin-purging cleanse. I wish I had set this experiment up with more control of which facet is responsible for what. I can't say how much of which is doing this much of that, but between oil pulling, TRT, GH, Bulletproof coffee, IF, clean diet, and cardio, I know that I feel really good and trust that the science (some myth) behind it all will show in time.

As I lose weight, I realize that I have much further to go than I originally thought. I believed that at 315, if I cut up to 275 I would be fairly ripped, which could have been true if I stayed at those same doses and trained/lived like a bodybuilder........maybe. But now I see that at TRT levels and having the injury setbacks, along with the honest view of myself at 285 in the mirror, I would have to be closer to 255 to be ripped (sub 12%) while at TRT dose and my current activity level. Then again, I don't know just how much mass I'm going to lose during the cut either, seeing as I'm restricting cals, not doing much free weight training, doing cardio, and not blasting the AAS.

Should be an interesting journey. This is the first time I've not dreaded the mass/strength loss that I knew would be inevitable one day. I trust that my muscle memory will be beneficial when I can get back in the gym and increase cals. Look at that, it's time for my first meal in 16.5 hours.