Trying to help out a buddy, but GOTDAMB!

[HGH]

so i have a good friend whose close with my whole circle of friends. he's also a business contact.

he is out of shape so i let him come be my training partner.

the problem is that it never ceases to amaze me how delusional a man can be.

1) SO many fat guys think of themselves as "big guys" and don't really understand that fat and strength aren't the same thing.

2) Also totally delusional as to how fat he is. he is like 235-240. he wants to get to 190 and thinks he'll be "cut" at that weight. but he's 37 and hasn't lifted a weight since sophomore year of college. he gets 3 solid reps of 185 after we've lifted together for about 7 weeks. that's not what ripped 190 looks like. he's a 165 pound dude under there.

3) he is not careful. if i add weight to a lift he WILL immediately try to add weight, regardless of how well he performed the previous weight. he gets pissy when i refuse to let him.

4) he is SUPER proud of micro-accomplishments. like today he did "20 dips" but his ROM is like 5 inches. i have to hold back from calling him out every time or his ego gets bruised. i doubt he can do 1 dip with a full ROM, going down deep. he doesn't even hit 90 degrees.

so yeah i bought a belt to add weight to my dips but didnt even bring it today because i knew he'd want to try it.

oh yeah and he misses days. in 7 weeks he's missed like 6 days.

:-(

 

[rawdeal]

Pray for him missing 6 days out of 7 DAYS. No matter how much I like someone, or even female someone's, I learned long ago to keep the gym separate from the rest of my life. Sounds like he may burn out soon anyway, meanwhile, good luck.

 

[OldManStrength]

I know what you mean, I think the general population just sees someone who is ripped or big and for real strong, and thinks anyone can be that. Until someone has put in the work to drop their body fat to that 7% spot or so, they will never understand how much hard work it really takes. Or the guys who are 230lb of solid muscle are huge in person, and look great. but it took years to become so.

I would just let your friend figure out for himself, its not battle with you or anyone else but with his own mind, discipline, and self-controle. Maybe let him fail a few times so he can figure it out for himself like the rest of us had to do. Figure out our limits.

OMS

 

[PillarofBalance]

Put 315 on the bar and have him bench.

 

[5.0]

Put 315 on the bar and have him bench.

And spot him from about 4ft away while on your phone

 

[BrotherIron]

Put 315 on the bar and have him bench.

Or put 225 on the squat bar and let him try to squat it.

 

[HGH]

Put 315 on the bar and have him bench.

uh yeah he would die. he can't even hit 225.

and honestly i'm fine with someone not being able to bench 225 when they've only been lifting for 7 weeks. but. at least understand that you're a weaker dude.

 

[HGH]

Or put 225 on the squat bar and let him try to squat it.

surprise! he has bad knees. when you walk around overweight for 20 years that'll happen.

 

[Bro Bundy]

Ego is the killer .. People that can't put that aside never go far

 

[Titan]

This new guy you're training is not familiar with this health and fitness culture. Just like you wouldn't be familiar with another countries culture. What you have to do is explain to him how to reach his goals instead of being annoyed with his understandable ignorance. You're the one responsible here and it doesn't look like your representing your life style very well. My guess is he will be turned off by this new way of life simply because you failed to teach him how to successfully live this new way of life...Shame on you HGH

 

[BrotherIron]

surprise! he has bad knees. when you walk around overweight for 20 years that'll happen.

Truthfully, he needs to squat and often to strength the connective tissue but of course there is a catch. He needs to use proper technique.

 

[Yomo]

I've never had the pleasure to train with that kind of "ego", but have had my fair share of arguments with people who like you say, assume just because they weigh a certain amount, they consider themselves "strong". I worked with one guy who weighed every bit of 350+ at around 6'1, who bragged about a 300lb deadlift for reps (not even double digits). He also claimed his bench was terrible because he was more interested in "Strongman" style events, without ever once actually lifting on a regular basis.
Another guy who claims the only reason I can lift so much is because I'm short so I obviously have "short" arms, even though my wingspan is 2-3 inches longer than my height (he also claims humans don't have wingspans). Neither took into account that I actually bust my ass for my numbers (numbers which I have no bragging rights for/I consider myself very average). So I typically end any such argument with my go to phrase for people like that...."you're weak and I'm stronger than you" typically repeated over and over in a very childish manner until they no longer can tolerate it.