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Was in phyc ward

bigrobbie

bigrobbie

MuscleHead
Sep 19, 2010
526
150
#13
My brother! I'm so sorry...I had a nervous breakdown a while back from takin on too much.

I have severe anxiety and depression issues and have myself landed in the hospital.

Please go to a therapist and get a referral to an MD who can get you on the right meds. I'm on Zoloft and Klonapin and it makes all the difference!

My prayers and thoughts are w/ you. PM if you need anything, I see my forum as a family, let us know what we can do bro!

was in phyc ward
well guys i had abad day sunday.. got into big fight with girlplus have been tryingto deal with my dad dieing and my daughters mom dieing and alotofother shit and i went nuts.. couldnttake it any more..so i ate two whole bottles ofpills and tried to kill myself... my mom found me and went to hospital..got me medically clear as i was about to die... then they admitted me to the phyc ward and have been there all week.. i just got out.. was on suicide watch for a while... guys i just coulodnt take shit no more.. it was the stupidest thing i could have ever done... i dont know what i was thinking.... but i am better now..have alot of class to go to now but i have to do what i have to do.... sorry for for this and being stupid and being away.... i am back now..
 
Mindlesswork

Mindlesswork

Crusty Poo Butt
Sep 21, 2010
1,395
33
#14
How you doing today, bulldog? Here's to things looking up for you..you have a great support group here for a rock in a mental storm. I been thru depression and setbacks of my own and can definitely relate
 
rocco-x

rocco-x

MuscleHead
Sep 16, 2010
398
15
#17
bg,i seen you around for a while now and you seem like a good dude.i've been where you were with the pills and all.i downed close to 50 2mg xanies years back plus all the 151 rum i could swallow.i was literally passed out for 3 days.somehow my girl at the time found me and since she's a nurse knew what to do.the psych ward,shit,twice i got put in one.shot me up with a shitload of thorazine after i split some guys cheek and nose open with a beer mug and the other for tryin to off myself with my off duty piece.shit ain't no joke.get some help mentally before it's too late.no one wants to hear about you offing yourself like this bro...fight like a mother f-er,i know i still do to this day.i still get suicidal thoughts once in a while.i'm goin to the doctors in a week or two to finally get back on some meds.i know i need them.people like us tend to just "black out' on someones ass and then when it's over we don't recall jack shit.that's the scary part for me,not remembering shit.keep talkin about what's goin on,hell pm me if you gotta.i'm always lurking somewhere on these boards dude.please,don't cut yourself short.you can pull through this.we all can....
 
niko

niko

Member
Sep 16, 2010
10
0
#18
seen you around some also and im glad you are ok for now I hope you have good people surrounding you. Good people can make the difference for you bro ,stay strong!
 
M

meriduffinz

New Member
Oct 17, 2010
5
0
#19
MY, this thread is very, very sad. I do understand where you're coming from on all sides. Death & seeing someone you love die is a miserble experience....feeling so helpless, out of control. There are always reasons why we must experience the pain in our lives, but it is through this pain you become a stronger person. How could anyone ever help others if they have not been through the depths of hell before rising into a place of emotional power and freedom. Suicide is a powerless feeling and it is not something you can control....it is an action of depression/hopelessness. Unfortunatily, when someone chooses this option...BECAUSE IT IS A CHOICE....if they are able to succeed in those efforts, many people are left behind with unanswered questions. Those family members who remain living because their loved one decided to leave this world...are left feeling guilty and ashamed. They feel like they should have done something, that they could have never prevented. Depression is a disease that people underestimate the consequeces & how it affects all those involved...the ones who live with depression & those who support them. Last year a friend of mines 24 yr old nephew shot and killed himself. I haven't spoken to her since a week after the incident. She was so very angry, & couldn't understand I did know what she was feeling. So the death of one person not only destroyed a life, a family but friendships as well. Don't know if any of you remember, Joe Meeko killed himself last year around this time of year. He had so much going for him at the time.
 
testboner

testboner

VIP Member
Oct 10, 2010
189
70
#20
Damnit dude, what the hell did you choose that direction for? Shit I did the same thing and I know exactly what goes through the thoughts.
You got a lotta crap to work through. Just when you think it's all better. . . once you've made that attempt, it becomes a temptation to take that way again when something heavy hits. It's weird shit.
Back in 1998 a couple months after divorce from my wife of 10 years, I swallowed handfulls (large handfulls) of vicodin, soma, demerol, esgic (migraine med that has a barbituate),and ambien. Chased em all with a full 750ml bottle of Malibu Rum. I was shocked that I still had coherant thought (that's what I was trying to numb. The emotional pain was too much). It's not that I was trying to kill myself, but I didn't want to feel the pain I was feeling. I wanted a break. Anyhow. . . those 100+ pills didn't handle it quick enough and so I started looking for what else there was to take or drink. Only thing was a brand new bottle of 500 aspirin. I drank down 460 of those.
I was found bout 10min later through a crazy string of events (far too much to describe). Anyhow, spent 4 days in ICU. Stomach pumped, swallowing charcoal and whatever the shit they make you injest to absorb toxins. I had to speak to a mental health worker to evaluate my emotional state. Fortunately we went to the same church and they didn't admit me.
Anyhow dood. . . I have gone through a lot more HARDCORE struggles since that time. They all felt like "Oh SHIT not again!!!!!!!!!!!". INSTANTLY, my mind drifted to a way out. But I realized that shit's a ripoff. The good that has come into my life since all of that is both something I could never foresee, and also something that I could realize I would have thrown away. It's scary man. So close to ending it all (a PERMANANT REALITY),and not getting to know the things I have come to know now.
Don't take what happened for granted. Don't take it lightly. You'll be thought of as weak and focked up by some for doing what you did. That sucks, because your actually strengthened by the experience if you use it positively. Just handle it by a change of mentality. . . not with sensory numbing medications. You gotta walk head on through all the pain of reality and make changes along the way. Adapt. Life is good Bro, even when it's really shitty. We get blocked from "feeling" good so much, that we lose touch with just existing and rolling with the punches. There is far more good than bad in this world Bro. I'm not blowin smoke up your ass.
Hit me up in PM if you want to. I'll check in at least every couple days. Glad your here ;)
 
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