Stay Woke

Discussion in 'Member Online Journals' started by Go Away, Jan 3, 2018.

  1. Go Away

    Go Away TID Board Of Directors

    Dec 28, 2011
    What's good, family?
    A new year, new goals and a new training journal.
    I've been ghost for so long while in recovery for alcoholism and haven't found the time or motivation to get back in the gym. I think I've lifted like 6 times in the last year or so, couldn't tell you. School has kept me ridiculously busy, as well as kids' sports, but luckily I planned this coming semester out so I have plenty of time to hit the weights and get back in shape.

    I spent the last twelve months eating my way around this drinking bullshit, yo-yo'ing back and forth for short spurts with different diets... the "eat half of what you normally eat" one, the "bodybuilding 40/40/20" joint, Intermittent Fasting... none of that shit worked for me. I would do good for a week, quit, get heavier than I was prior to the haphazard diet, get sad and eat bowls and bowls of cereal. Chocolate milk with Cocoa Pebbles and gloom-type shit. Somehow the New Years Resolution thing, coupled with having a bigger than dad-bod belly, has kicked me in the ass to get back in shape and take my health seriously. I had a checkup with the doctor for bloodworm to check for diabetes and thyroid function last month, passing with flying colors - good to hear - but my back pain is creeping up again and I weigh the same I did at my heaviest... but don't fit into my fat-boy XXL shirts anymore. Only fat has been gained with copious muscle loss.

    Started CarbNite yesterday and spent most of the day whining about the shit we had in the fridge from the holidays. I started tossing things out and have begun the journey of ketogenic dieting once again, this time with a renewed vigor that had me crushing veggies with meals yesterday. I'm up to 315, but like I said before... I have been 315 while training consistently in the gym and could still rock my XL Old Navy v-necks and not look silly... Now my XXL tees almost expose my overstretched belly like a fat guy from Trailer Park Boys and shit.

    My four new goals for 2018:
    1. Drop 50 lbs by Summer
    2. Daily walks of 10 minutes minimum, twice a day.
    3. Training in the gym three times a week, minimum
    4. Get healthy enough to play in an indoor, old man soccer league with my neighbors in the Fall

    I found a copy of Brian Carroll's 10/20/Life that helped motivate me to pay attention to how I use my back, to train enough to spark adaptation and improve overall fitness and to stick with a diet that's been proven to work for me. Powerlifting will have to take a backseat while I do just enough to not be a fucking fat ass... it hurts to say it but my addictive personality kicks into high gear very often and tossing number chasing in the mix has shown to drastically slow down the other areas of my life, especially school and home. When I establish myself professionally I should have plenty of time for hobbies outside of illustration and that horizon is only two semesters away. I feel comfortable with knowing I sacrificed my health for a bit to grind out A's, get sober and keep my family intact, but that cannot be the norm. I need balance and longevity in life and in the gym, professionally and mentally and this "how much did I get done today" bar that gets so easily set needs to take a back seat. It's that concept Andrey Malanichev voiced about Americans pressing the importance of short term gains that's had me contemplating my daily schedules. If I don't get some arbitrary task done that was on my list, so the fuck what? It'll be there tomorrow, just like the rest of the list. I'm not supporting laziness, just an understanding that you can't go and go all the time and expect to be happy, calm and patient. I have enough problems mentally - I shouldn't stack the deck against myself so often.

    Holy shit - thanks for letting me rant. I've always felt that the TID community gains from stories like this - struggle overcame by increased will and gained knowledge. Not that this will help all, but could motivate some to get their shit together and better themselves. Totals can wait - I need to get going first!

    Included in this training journal will be all the mundane bodybuilding exercises I'm using, some diet details, weight-loss progress and general banter. I appreciate this community greatly and strangely look back at the times I saw the Tapatalk app on my phone and thought, "Not yet. I'm not ready..."

    Now, I'm ready.

    CarbNite, Day 2: 315 lbs
    Heady Muscle, Yomo, ITAWOLF and 4 others like this.
  2. FLEXjs

    FLEXjs TID Board Of Directors

    Apr 23, 2012
    Welcome back.
  3. MAYO

    MAYO Bad Mother

    Sep 27, 2010
    Get it boiiii!
  4. CFM

    CFM VIP Member

    Mar 18, 2012
    Moderation coupled with constancy. Lesser MoFo's have done this.
  5. BrotherIron

    BrotherIron TID Board Of Directors

    Mar 6, 2011
    Good to see ya back after it.
  6. PillarofBalance

    PillarofBalance Strength Pimp Staff Member

    Feb 27, 2011
    What's up dude! Good luck getting rolling again. Seems like you already figured out the crash and burn thing doesn't work so well.

    Good luck!
  7. Go Away

    Go Away TID Board Of Directors

    Dec 28, 2011
    Good to be back!

    Thank you, Sir.

    You showed a ton of support while I was struggling early last year. I will always appreciate it.

    I still plan on hitting an elite total using all the knowledge you've dropped on me. I know it's cliche, but one day at a time - I'll get there.
  8. Go Away

    Go Away TID Board Of Directors

    Dec 28, 2011
    Snowed up over here with plans to take down decorations and chill.
    Will start training tomorrow - I'm excited to put in work.

    CarbNite, Day 3: 311.5 lbs
  9. 5.0

    5.0 VIP Member

    Nov 3, 2012
    So glad to see you back GA and hear your success with alcohol/family/school! Yes TID is a great community and we all do gain insight from these "rants". Looking forward to seeing your post tomorrow
  10. MAYO

    MAYO Bad Mother

    Sep 27, 2010
    Keep em coming

    ITAWOLF VIP Member

    Dec 9, 2010
    You got this GO

    50 is nothing but some sweating and good ole body rub downs away

    FD prob can help ya with the rubs

    Go Away likes this.
  12. Go Away

    Go Away TID Board Of Directors

    Dec 28, 2011
    Get me his number - I have a lot of free time in January and my glutes are hella sore...
    ITAWOLF likes this.

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