Pig Vomit
VIP Member
- Nov 12, 2022
- 253
- 405
So....three therapists....and each have told me I have a pattern of this....and I know it's true. I can be very, very vindictive. I was talking to a friend who works for my old agency the other day...and he told me he talks about me to the new officers and I'm a bit of a legend about what a good investigator I was, how I could be someone's best friend or their worst fucking enemy. One time I literally gave a tweaker ID theft suspect a heart attack during intense questioning. I was put off a little bit by the knowledge that my buddy is telling people who have never even met me about how doggedly I would pursue a suspect....or a supervisor....who had wronged me. I really couldn't argue with him because it's absolutely a fact. I've never lied in these situations, but have used the truth against people and will not let things go...especially people with badges who lie. There weren't many (that I knew of), but if I caught an officer lying about even a little thing in an official capacity, I was gonna F you hard. We're talking things that are still ongoing several years after I retired (it's been awhile). Still....ongoing....to this day. I'm even a bit ashamed about how badly I have pursued some of these people....but yet I still do it.
Yesterday I talked about how we had two Thanksgiving dinner visits planned. One of them was at the house of an officer I used to work with, and every year they have an open invite for everyone at the PD, because they are very kind people and don't want people to be lonely on holidays. I got a call from the officer while I was at the gym, and he told me that the person I had the biggest beef with at the PD had just RSVP'd to their dinner and he wanted to make sure I was aware because he knows how badly I hate this guy. I didn't really know what I was going to do, but the unbridled anger that welled up inside me started bubbling out of the pot, and during the first dinner I was obsessing over what I was going to do, and when we drove away from the first dinner, I had every intention of going home, freshening up, grabbing stuff we planned to bring, then would head over to the second dinner. When it came time to leave, the spouse just kind of assumed we would not be going. I was so worked up and angry that I decided it would not be a good idea, so we cancelled. I spent the entire afternoon, even at the first dinner, drinking poison hoping that MFer dies.
Mind you, I would not have made a scene, and I would not have been physically violent, but the tension that would have been in the air would have been palpable for everyone. I suppose in my fantasy he would have asked to speak with me and apologized for what he had done to me. I would not have been conciliatory, because I HATE liars with badges, but it might have given me some closure. But liars do not come around and tell the truth, they only rationalize and tell more lies. Thus I cancelled.
Tonight we DID go over to our friends' house for leftovers. I learned that the liar came alone the previous night, and it was clear he was lonely. I couldn't help but take some satisfaction from that, because I'm in a long-term stable relationship and frankly I hope that F'r dies lonely and miserable. Plus he got fat, and the mean MFer in me wants to just send a text or e-mail, not anonymous, that says "I hear you got fat." Short, simple, brutal.
So....wondering....does the concept of "drinking poison hoping the other person dies" resonate with you? Care to give examples? I'm putting up a poll for an easy out for people, but it would be nice if you could give examples. I think that as a whole body-obsessed people like probably most of us here are similar and have a greater propensity for this sort of thing than the general public.
I wish I could be more specific about what this guy did to me, but....privacy. I still have one ongoing court case left over from my career, and it's a big one, and it's another case of me being in dogged pursuit of someone with compromised morals, so I still have to be somewhat reserved in what I can talk about.
Yesterday I talked about how we had two Thanksgiving dinner visits planned. One of them was at the house of an officer I used to work with, and every year they have an open invite for everyone at the PD, because they are very kind people and don't want people to be lonely on holidays. I got a call from the officer while I was at the gym, and he told me that the person I had the biggest beef with at the PD had just RSVP'd to their dinner and he wanted to make sure I was aware because he knows how badly I hate this guy. I didn't really know what I was going to do, but the unbridled anger that welled up inside me started bubbling out of the pot, and during the first dinner I was obsessing over what I was going to do, and when we drove away from the first dinner, I had every intention of going home, freshening up, grabbing stuff we planned to bring, then would head over to the second dinner. When it came time to leave, the spouse just kind of assumed we would not be going. I was so worked up and angry that I decided it would not be a good idea, so we cancelled. I spent the entire afternoon, even at the first dinner, drinking poison hoping that MFer dies.
Mind you, I would not have made a scene, and I would not have been physically violent, but the tension that would have been in the air would have been palpable for everyone. I suppose in my fantasy he would have asked to speak with me and apologized for what he had done to me. I would not have been conciliatory, because I HATE liars with badges, but it might have given me some closure. But liars do not come around and tell the truth, they only rationalize and tell more lies. Thus I cancelled.
Tonight we DID go over to our friends' house for leftovers. I learned that the liar came alone the previous night, and it was clear he was lonely. I couldn't help but take some satisfaction from that, because I'm in a long-term stable relationship and frankly I hope that F'r dies lonely and miserable. Plus he got fat, and the mean MFer in me wants to just send a text or e-mail, not anonymous, that says "I hear you got fat." Short, simple, brutal.
So....wondering....does the concept of "drinking poison hoping the other person dies" resonate with you? Care to give examples? I'm putting up a poll for an easy out for people, but it would be nice if you could give examples. I think that as a whole body-obsessed people like probably most of us here are similar and have a greater propensity for this sort of thing than the general public.
I wish I could be more specific about what this guy did to me, but....privacy. I still have one ongoing court case left over from my career, and it's a big one, and it's another case of me being in dogged pursuit of someone with compromised morals, so I still have to be somewhat reserved in what I can talk about.
